I'm sorry, but Notre Dame is currently losing to the Air Force Academy by the score of 31-10. In case you were wondering, the Air Force Academy's team is made up of non-scholarship student, whereas Notre Dame has more than 100 scholarship players. Last week, they lost 46-44 to the Naval Academy, whose team is similarly made up of non-scholarship student athletes.
Notre Dame's current record is 1-8. Their only victory came against unranked UCLA, who, due to injuries, were forced to start their third-string walk-on quarterback. That game, Notre Dame managed fewer than 150 yards of offense, and won solely because UCLA turned the ball over seven times, five of which were the courtesy of the aforementioned walk-on quarterback. This season, Notre Dame has suffered blowout losses against Georgia Tech, Penn State, Michigan, Michigan State, Purdue, and USC. Prior to their close loss to the Naval Academy, they last lost nine of their previous 10 games by an average of 24 points. Notre Dame's teams have sustained very few injuries over the past two seasons, while three of its opponents have been forced to play without their starting quarterbacks.
Prior to their high-scoring game against the Naval Academy, Notre Dame was ranked 118th out of the 119 Division I teams in total offense, 119th in rushing offense, and 112th in points scored.
Everything about Notre Dame's football program pisses me off. I hate the fact that they refuse to play ranked teams anywhere other than their native South Bend, Indiana. I hate the fact that, due to Notre Dame's lucrative exclusive contract with NBC, opposing teams have a financial stake in going along with it. I hate the fact that Notre Dame markets itself as a sort of 'home team' to Irish Americans, despite the fact that their mascot is a crass Irish stereotype. I hate the fact that Notre Dame is highly ranked in every pre-season poll, no matter how shitty they were the previous season. I hate the fact that Notre Dame fired coach Tyrone Willingham after just three seasons, one of which was enormously successful, then replaced him with Charlie Weis, who, after two moderately successful seasons, they offered a ten-year contract worth $40 million. I hate the fact that their games are broadcast in primetime on NBC every weekend, despite the fact that they are one of the very worst teams in all of college football. I hate the fact that Eastbay has an entire page of Notre Dame football apparel. And I hate the fact that fat, middle-aged, racist working class Catholics with no personal affiliation with Notre Dame actually wear it.
Willingham is black, Weis is white. Maybe this is a coincidence. Then again, Notre Dame fans loudly and frequently wax nostalgic for the good old days of the 1950's and 1960's, when Notre Dame's teams were almost entirely white, featured white players at the so-called skilled positions, and was the de facto first-choice for every talented Roman Catholic high school player in the country. Notre Dame officials and fans throw around code words ("tradition," "history," etc.) which, without too much effort, can be understood as nostalgia for a time before more athletic black kids from the SEC and Pac-10 started kicking their asses. Paul Hornung was once the handsome, square-jawed, blond-haired, all-America, Heisman trophy-winning tailback who led Notre Dame to consecutive national championships. Hornung graduated in 1957. In the hearts of Notre Dame fans everywhere, this was the high-water mark of human civilization - Notre Dame was the best college football team in the world, and its best player was a white, Irish, Roman Catholic boy from Kentucky.
I hate the fact that they sold their much-anticipated match-up with the University of Miami in 1988 as "the Catholics versus the Convicts," then went out of their way to provoke a brawl between with the well-behaved (at least on the field) Miami Hurricanes, then, in the press, used coded language to imply that the real problem was with the out-of-control black kids from Miami, instead of with Notre Dame's well behaved Christian school boys, and I hate that they did the exact same thing against USC the following year.
I have nothing - absolutely nothing - against the University, which is one of the best Universities in the midwest. Many of my best friends went to school there. I just hate everything associated with their football, and I want them off of my television.
UPDATE: In a press conference after saturday's loss to the Air Force Academy, Notre Dame head coach Charlie Weis blamed the loss on his players' failure to learn enough from him. I'm sure that's going to go over well, and foresee no potentially negative repercussions.